Introduction

As you and your partner prepare to walk down the aisle, understanding every facet of each other—warts and all—is crucial. While many focus on the rosy aspects of a relationship, it’s just as important to consider those less-than-perfect traits. This is where the SYMBIS (Save Your Marriage Before It Starts) assessment comes into play, providing deep insights that help Christian couples build a strong, God-centered marriage.

Understanding Your Partner's Annoying Traits

Tyler Jamison, Ph.D. underscores a vital aspect of relationship dynamics: the permanence of our partner’s aggravating traits. He suggests that "even the most lovable partners have annoying traits, and they may only intensify over time." In the light of Christian marriage, this perspective shifts slightly—Scripture teaches us in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 that "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs." Embracing these enduring traits isn't just about tolerance, but about growing in love and patience, mirroring the love Christ shows us.

The Role of SYMBIS in Premarital Counseling

Developed by Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott, the SYMBIS assessment is a comprehensive tool designed for couples considering marriage. It’s especially helpful for Christians, as it aligns with Biblical principles, offering insights into how couples can navigate their differences with grace and understanding. Integrating SYMBIS into premarriage counseling provides a structured way to uncover and discuss potential challenges before they become issues.

Practical Steps for Christian Couples

Here are a few practical steps to handle differences:

- Discuss Openly: Ephesians 4:15 teaches us to "speak the truth in love," encouraging open and honest communication.

- Choose Your Battles: As advised by relationship researchers, not all issues are solvable. Focus on what can be resolved.

- Forgiveness and Grace: Colossians 3:13 says, "Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you."

Dr. Vinnie Cappetta's Role

In my role as a counselor and pastor, I integrate the SYMBIS assessment into our Christian counseling practice at Check Your Compass Coaching and Counseling. Couples can choose from a self-paced online course, which includes the SYMBIS assessment, or opt for a more personalized approach that includes four one-hour sessions with me. This allows us to delve deeper into the results and tailor strategies that best suit your relationship.

Call to Action

Ready to lay a solid foundation for your marriage? We invite you to explore our premarriage preparation programs. Spaces are limited each month to ensure personalized attention, so don’t hesitate.

Visit our coaching page today to learn more or enroll in one of our programs.

Let’s prepare for a lifelong journey together, built on understanding and strengthened by faith.

Conclusion

Embracing each other’s imperfections is not just a marital strategy, but a spiritual discipline. As you prepare for marriage, remember that understanding and accepting the full spectrum of your partner’s personality is not only wise but also a profound expression of the love that "always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres" (1 Corinthians 13:7).